A Comprehensive Guide To Stress Management
Because it is the water in which we all swim, it is pointless to try to eliminate stress altogether. It is a part of life that must be managed to minimise the negative downstream effects. Read on to find out how to do so.
Simply put, stress is the disturbance of the body’s ability to regulate its inner environment. When this happens, disease occurs. At first glance, the hallmarks of stress seem instantly recognisable - work deadlines, financial woes or the death of a loved one. Suboptimal sleep and environmental toxins (be they from make-up ingredients, household cleaning products or toxic fumes), are less obvious - and equally important - triggers and drivers. When viewed from this wider perspective, it is clear that everyone - from a newborn baby to a high-powered executive in the City - is susceptible to stress.
In my experience, most people are far more likely to work towards improving their diet or fitness than taking steps to manage stress. Unfortunately, not giving stress management the attention that it deserves sabotages any other efforts to achieve optimal health (both mental and physical) and longevity.
The stress response begins in the brain. The perception of alarm or danger causes the eyes and ears to send information to the amygdala, an area of the brain responsible for emotional processing. The amygdala interprets the images and sounds and, if it also perceives the situation or event to be dangerous, it instantly relays this to the hypothalamus.
The hypothalamus signals the adrenal glands which then secrete hormones – such as cortisol, epinephrine and norepinephrine – that begin a cascade of physiological events. These include but are not limited to:
Widening of small airways in the lungs to facilitate the rapid influx of oxygen to the brain to boost alertness
A rise in blood pressure which floods the muscles, heart and other vital organs with blood
The release of stored glucose and fats into the bloodstream to fuel an impending bout of fight-or-flight
Modern lifestyle choices (like late nights and doomscrolling) are also perceived by our brains - and bodies - to be as life-threatening as an encounter with a sabre-toothed tiger.
As a result, a primal mechanism (designed to offer short-term protection from imminent danger) now gets triggered far more frequently than was originally intended by Mother Nature. This creates the perfect internal environment in which chronic disorders - like hypervigilance (associated with anxiety), high blood pressure and type 2 diabetes - can thrive.
Stress can be managed in two ways - removing or reducing stressors and building resilience.
Removing or reducing stressors
Use technology wisely: Used wisely, technology can make our lives easier and, therefore, more fun. There is, however, a fine line between utility and excessive dependence. Depression, impaired sleep, obesity and insulin resistance are just a few conditions linked with increased exposure to the dizzying array of devices available to us today. The good news is that consistent small changes and simple habits yield reassuringly positive results. Depending on the level of commitment that appeals to you, any - or a mix - of the following may be helpful:
Consider spending an hour a day away from your phone. Increase this period gradually and note how you feel. Blue light emitted from screens (including - but not limited to - computer screens, tablets, smartphones and televisions) is known to deplete melatonin (the regulatory hormone of sleep and wakefulness). Alternatively, try limiting the use of your devices at least two hours before bed.
Choose one day (every week) on which to completely resist the urge to check your phone, watch television or use a computer.
Book a week's holiday to a destination with no Wi-Fi and/or television.
Consider a “break-up”. Catherine Price describes this (in her book, How To Break Up With Your Phone) as "giving yourself the space, freedom and tools necessary to create a long-term relationship" with your phone. You will find that a lot of its principles apply to other forms of technology, too.
Get off the hamster wheel: your nervous system breathes a sigh of relief when you swap working harder for working smarter. Our culture is wedded to the notion that a perpetual doer is some kind of latter-day hero. It is alarmingly easy to spend our days reacting to other people’s priorities (answering emails as they arrive, for instance) rather than in service to our deepest purpose. “Busy-ness” for its own sake (as opposed to intentional actions that bring you closer to your most important goal) eventually leads to burnout. Start by figuring out the One Thing you were put on this earth to do - your highest goal. Each day, prioritise a few tasks that will help you attain that goal and demote (or ditch) the rest. Nourish your body, rest and repeat.
Optimise your health: anecdotally (and in the scientific literature), it is clear that health is inversely proportional to chronic stress (i.e. as the former increases, the latter decreases). As health improves, stress levels diminish and resilience (the ability to cope with or bounce back from stressful events) increases. The opposite is also true. As health declines (or as illness becomes chronic), stress levels increase and resilience diminishes. Health is upheld by four pillars: diet, exercise, sleep and stress management. Weakening/removal of one (or more) of the pillars has a knock-on effect on the others and, eventually, the whole thing collapses. If your enthusiasm for stress management is low, I recommend strengthening the other pillars of health instead. I have written articles on diet, exercise and sleep that can help in this regard. You can also work with a nutritionist for targeted interventions for gut dysfunction/inflammation, blood sugar disregulation, etc. that can complement and enhance medical treatment. Reduce the burden of environmental toxins by filtering water, eating organic food (or growing your own), choosing non-toxic toiletries/household cleaning products, non-plastic food containers and Teflon-free cookware. You can find some of my favourites here.
Building resilience
Resilience is the ability to adapt in the face of adversity. Once cultivated, it acts like a suit of armour, softening the blow of stressful events beyond our control. Resilience can be built by:
Practising acceptance: Byron Katie once said, “When you argue with reality, you lose, but only 100% of the time.” Acceptance is often confused with condoning (or approving of) a situation. Nothing could be further from the truth. Accepting that something beyond your control has already happened, choosing the next best step to take and taking it can be both empowering and freeing.
Addressing unhelpful/counterproductive thoughts and behaviours: we identify so much with the constant chatter in our heads that we frequently perceive it to be the unequivocal truth. Train yourself to stop taking everything so personally and to frame events more charitably. For example, the man who just cut you up in traffic may be late for an important appointment and not at all focused on putting you in a bad mood. In the same vein, “failure” could be perceived as an opportunity to work out - without self-judgement - what you could have done differently to achieve a desired result. Meditation is a great way to train your mind to not get too attached to your thoughts.
Practising gratitude: studies show that making a conscious effort to bring to mind things we are grateful for (in the midst of a stressful situation) shifts our nervous system from fight-or-flight to rest-and-digest, the latter being the state that puts us on an even keel.
Banishing perfectionism: because it can never be attained, perfectionism is the lowest possible standard to aspire to. Doing your best will always be good enough.